Goals and direction

A good friend asked me a question about goals and the danger of spiralling thoughts if they’re not reached. In replying I thought about the Stockdale paradox and noted that I’ve been that broken optimist around some of my own desires. If setting a goal that isn’t entirely within your control, or is a remarkable stretch, it might be better to choose merely a direction … Continue reading Goals and direction

Pleasing everyone, all the time

It’s impossible to cater for everyone, especially in contexts that are focused on individual preference. Aiming to do so is the right thing, though there comes a point where a decision must be made on the best compromise. I don’t like to compromise, though there may be no better way when there are finite resources or opportunities. Where compromise is made, we must be conscious … Continue reading Pleasing everyone, all the time

Perspective from unexpected quarters

From a student I’m mentoring I heard that “COVID has ruined our working years”. They didn’t mean it quite as it sounded, though talking it through the young person’s words highlighted, for me, some over-dramatised thinking of my own. Have unfortunate events had an impact? Certainly. Will I really never reach my goals? Very unlikely. Is the future bleak and my working life for nought? … Continue reading Perspective from unexpected quarters

Trust, for the long haul

There’s a shallow kind, based on seeing attributes and hearing words that lend us to believe in someone. Folks can learn the words and attributes, then exploit this. Sales folks make a point of doing so. There’s another kind based on shared experiences and aligned values. This takes longer to form, though it builds a deeper commitment and is hard to short-cut. Remarkable politicians do … Continue reading Trust, for the long haul

YouTube projectors

Before I learned to better understand other people’s thinking, I’d pick all sorts of holes in their reasoning based on assumptions I’d made. Often based on feelings I was projecting onto them. This isn’t all that helpful – it creates heat without much light. When I notice that I’ve gotten caught up doing a similar thing now, I enjoy reading some YouTube comment threads. They … Continue reading YouTube projectors